So Pissed...
Delay...delay...delay...
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12:11 PM
YAY! I AM LEAVING TOMORROW!
BEIJING! HERE I COME!
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10:02 PM
Chinese was just a pain... and I am still not in the mood of studying phys...but i promise myself that I will go study after posting this...
here are some of the questions we got in the test:
“依今葬花人笑痴, 他年葬侬知是谁?” 翻译成现代汉语, 然后说林黛玉当时的心情...
“滴不尽相思血泪抛红豆,开不完春柳春花满画楼, 睡不稳纱窗风雨黄昏后, 忘不了新愁与旧愁, 咽不下玉粒金波噎满喉, 照不见菱花镜里形容瘦。展不开的眉头, 捱不明的更漏。呀! 恰便似遮不住的青山隐隐, 流不断的绿水悠悠。” 红豆是什么? 贾宝玉唱这个的目的是什么?
“刘姥姥便站起身来, 高声说道:"老刘,老刘,食量大似牛,吃一个老母猪不抬头。"自己却鼓着腮不语。众人先是发怔, 后来一听, 上上下下都哈哈的大笑起来。史湘云撑不住, 一口饭都喷了出来, 林黛玉笑岔了气, 伏着桌子嗳哟, 宝玉早滚到贾母怀里, 贾母笑的搂着宝玉叫"心肝", 王夫人笑的用手指着凤姐儿, 只说不出话来, 薛姨妈也撑不住, 口里茶喷了探春一裙子, 探春手里的饭碗都合在迎春身上, 惜春离了坐位, 拉着他奶母叫揉一揉肠子。地下的无一个不弯腰屈背, 也有躲出去蹲着笑去的, 也有忍着笑上来替他姊妹换衣裳的, 独有凤姐鸳鸯二人撑着, 还只管让刘姥姥。” 这段话用的是什么写作手法?
下面是史铁生写的《从“透析”到“安乐死”》
很久了,我就想说说尿毒症病人“透析”的事。三年前我双肾失灵,不得不以血液透析维持生命,但透析的费用之高是很少有人能自力承担的,幸而我得到了多方支援,否则不堪设想。否则会怎样?一是慢慢憋死(有点儿钱),二是快快憋死(没钱)。但憋死的过程是一样的残酷??身体渐渐地肿胀,呼吸渐渐地艰难,意识怪模怪样地仿佛在别处,四周的一切都仿佛浸泡在毒液里渐渐地僵冷。但这并不是最坏的感觉,最坏的感觉是:你的亲人在一旁眼睁睁地看着你,看着这样的过程,束手无策。但这仍不见得是最坏的感觉,最坏的感觉是:人类已经发明了一种有效的疗法,只要有钱,你就能健康如初,你就能是一个欢跳的儿子,一个漂亮的女儿,一个能干的丈夫或是一个温存的妻子,一个可靠的父亲或是一个慈祥的母亲,但现在你没钱,你就只好撕碎了亲人的心,在几个月的时间里一分一秒地撕,用你日趋衰弱的呼吸撕,用你忍不住的呻吟和盼望活下去的目光撕,最后,再用别人已经康复的事实给他们永久的折磨。谁经得住这样的折磨?是母亲还是父亲?是儿子还是女儿?是亲情还是那宏博的爱愿?
我有过这样的经历,幸而经历到一半时得到了救援。因而我知道剩下的一半是什么。我活过来了,但是有不得不去走那另一半的人呀。我闭上眼睛不去看他们,但你没法也闭上心哪。我见过一个借钱给儿子透析的母亲,她站在透析室门外,空望着对面的墙壁,大夫跟她说什么她好像都已经听不懂了。我听说过一对曾经有点儿钱的父母,一天一天卖尽了家产,还是不能救活他们未满成年的孩子。看见和听见,这多么简单,但那后面,是怎样由希望和焦虑终于积累成的绝望啊!
我听有位护士说过:“看着那些没钱透析的人,觉得真还不如压根儿就没发明这透析呢,干脆要死都死,反正人早晚都得死。”这话不让我害怕,反让我感动。是呀,你走进透析室你才发现(我不是说其他时候就不能发现)最可怕的是什么:人类走到今天,怎么连生的平等权利都有了疑问呢?有钱和没钱,怎么竟成了生与死的界线?这是怎么了?人类出了什么事?
如果你再走进另一些病房,走到植物人床前,走到身患绝症者的床前,你就更觉荒诞:这些我们的亲人,这些曾经潇洒漂亮的人,这些曾经都是多么看重尊严的人,如今浑身插满了各种管子,吃喝拉撒全靠它们,呼吸和心跳也全靠它们,他们或终日痛苦地呻吟,或一无知觉地躺着,或心里祈盼着结束,或任凭病魔的摆布。首先,这能算是人道吗?其次,当社会为此而投入无数资财的同时,却有另一些人得了并不难治的病,却因为付不起医疗费就耽误了。这又是怎么了?人类到底出了什么事?
出了什么事?比如说,高科技在飞速发展,随之,要想使一个身患绝症的人仅仅保持住呼吸和心跳,将越来越不是一件难事了,但它的代价是越来越多的资金投入。一方面,新的医疗手段和设备肯定是昂贵的,其发展的无止境意味着资金投入的无止境。另一方面,人最终都要面对死亡,如果人的生存权利平等,如果仅仅保持住心跳和呼吸也算生存,那么这种高科技、高资金的投入就更是无止境。两个无止境加起来,就会出现这样一种局面:有限的社会财富,将越来越多地用于延长身患绝症者的痛苦,而对其他患者的治疗投入就难免捉襟见肘了。
绝没有反对科学发展的意思。但是,随着高科技的发展,医学必然或者已经提出一些哲学问题了。医学已不再只是一门救死扶伤的技术,而是也要像文学和哲学那样问一下生命的意义了,问一下什么是生?什么是死?生的意义如何?以及,“安乐死”是否正当?
在不久前的《实话实说》节目中,听到一位法律专家陈述他反对“安乐死”的理由,他说得零乱,总结下来大致是两点。其一:“安乐死”从实行(即立法和执法)的角度看,困难很多,因此他认为是不应该的。这可真叫逻辑混乱。一事之应不应该实行,并不取决于其实行是否有困难,而是要取决于其实行是否正当。倘不正当,实行已失前提,还谈什么困不困难?倘其正当,那正是要克服困难的理由(以及正是表明法律专家并不白吃饭的时候),否则倒是默允或纵容了不正当。这样看,无论“安乐死”应不应该实行,都与困难无关,那专家说了半天等于什么都没说。
当然,应不应该,并不等于能不能够。见报纸上有文章说,从中国目前的条件看,“安乐死”还不能够很快实行。这我同意。但这又不等于说,我们不应该从现在就开始探讨它的正当性和可行性。
我住过很多回医院,见过很多身患绝症的人,见过他们对平安归去的祈盼,见过因这祈盼不得回应而给他们带来的折磨,生理的和精神的折磨,分分秒秒不得间歇。我真是想不通这到底是为了什么?似乎只是为了一种貌似人道的习俗。这样的时候,你既看不到人的尊严,也看不到人的爱愿,当然也就看不出任何一点人道;好像只是一次刑罚??一个堂堂正正的人,被病魔百般戏弄,失尽了尊严和自由,而另一些他的同类呢,要么冷漠地视而不见,要么爱莫能助,惟暗自祈祷着自己的归程万勿这般残忍。这简直是对所有人的一次侮辱,其辱不在死,人人都是要死的;其辱在于,历来自尊的人类在死亡面前竟是如此地慌张和无所作为。刑罚所以比死更可怕,就在于人眼睁睁地丧失了把握命运的能力。我想,创造刑罚的人一定是深谙这一点的。可我们为什么要让那必来的“归去”成为刑罚呢?为什么不能让它成为人生之旅的光明磊落的结束,坦然而且心怀敬意地送走我们所爱的人呢?
当有人(以及每一个人都可能)受此酷刑的折磨与侮辱之时,法律和法律之上的爱愿,只摆出几项改变它必然要遇到的困难,就可以溜之大吉并且心安理得了吗?
那位法律专家反对“安乐死”的另一个理由是:“人没有死的权利。”但是为什么呢?他未提供有力的说明。他除了说得有些蛮横,还说得有些含糊:“死是自然而然的事。”但自然而然的事就一定正当吗?真若这样,要你法律专家干吗?不过,这一回的问题好像真的不太简单。
“安乐死”还是不应该吗?还是要“自然而然”地任那绝症对人暴施折磨和侮辱吗?难道还有谁看不出“安乐死”并不是要取消人之生的权利,而是要解除那残酷的刑罚,是在那疑难的一刻仍要信奉神命、行其爱愿吗?神命难违,神不单给了人生的权利,还给了人自由的权利和追求幸福的权利。
梅老师只给我们半个文章,到“什么是死?生的意义如何?以及,“安乐死”是否正当”这里~当时一直纳闷,文章就提了安乐死一次,怎么题目就叫从透析到安乐死... 无奈中...
题目是根据文章写分析1) 文章揭示了什么? 2)作者如何表达他的想法的? 3)你看完文章的想法是什么
呵呵~题目大概有这些,还有别的一些完型填空什么的...反正是个disaster就对了!
痛苦... Now i have to do phys... 最近家里都没人,开始发愁晚上的饭了...sigh...
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3:12 PM
我可以写中文了!哈哈哈哈!
Erh!!! Chinese is such a pain to study! So tired... and after all the torturing in chinese class, I still forgot some of my wonderful chinese...shame on me! I donno how Im gonna survive tomorrow's exam... two essay+some random stuff... Eek... too scary to even think about it... also, haven't started to think abt phys...which is probably not a very good idea...shoot...
Already thinking about all the fun I get to have after exams r over...although there is still the TOEFL waiting for me in abt 6 days...
anyway, here is my plan (1st draft)
June 20
Phys exam in the morning, then drag someone with me to the korean mando ... after that, i'll need to go to bordrers to find a cook book with desert recipes. then i'll go to that indian place on Lex. ave for dinner~ hahaha, lots of nice food in a day, or maybe i should move one of the meals to wednesday! ?
June 21
No school, i might shopping, but i better do some TOEFL practices since i don't know anything abt it... so i won't screw up too badly... most likely, i'll stay home..but food is a ISSUE! OH, i have to go to TKD! first, tell them to sign the CAS form for me, then tell them give me a extension since the next time i'll appear will be two month away! OOH! and, i have to write my resume,which is due on the 23rd...i hate writing that...so pointless!
June 22
School...go to ms. lerner to sign the CAS! then Mr Lambert and i donno what to do for UNIS-UN yet...so confused...school sucks! but is sara's b-day! that makes the day better and it reminds me that i better get her a present on tueaday, june 20th at borders or somewhere else
June 23
half day of school, donno what to do after that...maybe go home and study for TOEFL...
June 24
TOEFL, donno how long it is going to take, but after finishing it, im definitely going shopping! i have to buy the ingredients for the desert (which i haven't decided yet...)...btw, im making them, and bringing them all the way to beijng~ haha~im such a idiot! i don't think dad will lemme use the oven in beijing...so...
June 25
Mom is coming home, i have no idea at what time though...she has no keys with her, so i have to stay home...
June 26
Totally going shopping! and hae to make a list for packing!
June 27
Packing.............it's always a pain!
June 28
YAY! Im flying to Beijing! YAY! So happy!
this is the plan, sounds pretty good for now...(if i follow)
anyway, i should go back to Chinese now, 红楼梦~eek! important chapters:25, 30, 31, 32, 40, 44, 46, 47...so annoying!
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8:08 PM
YEAH!!! I finished my art exam!!! from 8:30am--2:00pm + 6hrs the day before!
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2:02 PM
Finally, I managed to finish editting this blog!
Unfortunately, this does not support Chinese, at least from what i figured out...
Neh...I wanna write in chinese...It's cool...damn the blog...
Anyway...
I really shouldnt be doing this rite now cuz i have 5 more exams coming up...
Art tomorrow...really, who cares about Kiki Smith and Frida Kahlo? and what made the IB people think Higher art students like to analyze paintings instead of drawing? Erh...this is pissing me off so badly...AAAAHHHH! This art thingy is driving me insane!
By the way, i just finished my math exam this morning and will probably get some record breaking low grade, how exciting! But, the good side of it is that there are no math tests for the next nearly 3 month! Except i need to write my physcis extended essay on math...*sounds so odd* but it is a cool topic though. "Anamorphic Art"~ yep, I am seriously excited about this~
okok, gotta go, exams...grrrr....
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5:16 PM